An affair can be a way to improve your happiness, boost confidence, and have mind-blowing sex.
Affairs can also be dangerous if you get caught. Only if you are caught though, this guide will reduce your chance of being caught to near zero.
An affair is a decision with some benefits and some risks.
The sex – as human beings we need sex like we need food and water. If we can’t get it from our partners it can feel like we are starving for the pleasures of another human being. This can make affair sex extremely passionate and some of the best people ever have.
Affirmation – If are lacking connection with your current partner affairs can renew confidence. Often times people we know too well, like our partners, don’t appreciate our good qualities. When dating someone new we get compliments and approval again.
Realizations – Sometimes people don’t know exactly why they want an affair, they just do. By jumping in and trying it out you learn a lot about yourself and what you actually need in a partner.
True Love – If you find your soulmate in someone outside your marriage it can often be a cause for a healthy affair. Sometimes people simply marry too early before they were ready, leading to an unhappy marriage. You might grow more than your partner and be ready for another kind of love.
Assets – If you are caught you can expect a division of all your things. If you have a wife or husband this can mean your house, and half your assets. If you have a girlfriend it can mean losing a shared living situation.
Family Misunderstanding – Not everyone can be as open-minded or understanding as they should be. Sometimes family can give you the cold shoulder if they liked your spouse and they realize you were cheating.
Guilt – If you aren’t ready for an affair you can experience some feelings of guilt.
The rest of this guide is about having an affair in a way that lowers these risks as much as possible so you can enjoy the benefits of a healthy affair.
This involves being clever and meticulous.
Before you jump into an affair have an end game plan. Do you want a short or long term affair? A one night stand? Are you looking for romance?
Short Term Affair – The main focus here is to get laid, fuck each other hard and then never see each other again. In a short term fling you shouldn’t give out your real name so you can protect your identity if they turn out clingy. You don’t want a one-night stand affair finding you on facebook and seeing you have a relationship status
Long Term Affair – Short term affairs can turn into long term affairs if there is connection and amazing sex.
Some people are lucky and find partners where everything clicks and the affair is a matter of logistics. If that’s you skip to the next section.
If you don’t have a partner yet the good news is you can find one fairly easily with a bit of digging and using a few tools and techniques.
A dating site that is only for affairs, also the largest with about 56 million users. The downside is it can cost money to send over a certain number of messages per month, but you can find some really frustrated wives looking for affairs—this is where they hang out. There’s different forms of messaging too: messaging, chatting, and even voice calling. Helps for heating up the relationship more and more.
You can use the casual encounters section to post ads looking for people. Or search for people that are posting ads. This is a bit riskier than Ashley Madison because you can’t see feedback about people or chat with them using the site.
When using these sites avoid using your real name and avoid sharing your picture right away. Try to build up a rapport and see if its someone you would really want to meet.
You can also use tinder to find a date. This is a bit riskier than the other two methods so that’s why I list it here. You can use location mode to search for people in cities you might travel to for work. Or just use a fake name and picture in the location you live. Use a fake picture and name, then say that you are already in a relationship but looking for an affair.
You can join a private Kik group to find people to have an affair with. The kik groups are highly moderated meaning if anyone is lieing or scamming they will be kicked from the group. The result is a group of really high quality, interesting, and attractive people looking for affairs. You can find kik groups by searching for them on forums like reddit.
Whether you are meeting for a first date or want to do something out and about with your Affair Partner, its important to pick a quiet place. Not to quiet for a first date just to make sure the person is normal enough.
Ideas for a first date
Wherever you meet try to do it as far away from your home as possible, you want to avoid running into people that recognize you.
Always have an alibi ready in case you do stumble into someone you know or even your significant other.
Discuss the alibi with the affair partner if possible. If you are going for a secret one night stand you can try to be honest with them and say you are in a relationship that you want to get out of.
When you feel a connection with someone its time for the love making. You want a place where you can get passionate without having to worry at all about being caught.
Above all else don’t bring your partner back home and into your own bed, this is how 90% of people get caught in an affair. You are leaving all kinds of evidence all over for your spouse to find: hair, earrings, bodily fluids. Don’t do it.
Ideally you want to go to their place, especially if they are single. If you can’t go to their place try to get a cheap hotel. Depending on your city there might also be themed sex dungeons you can rent by the hour to really spice things up.
Set some ground rules for when you have sex. No biting, no hickies, no scratching. These are tough to make excuses for and will raise a lot of suspicion.
Take a lathered shower to get any smells off you.
Maintaining Long Term Affairs
If you plan on having longer than a one night stand you will have an extra set of risks to skirt, mostly about communicating.
The main way you can get found out is through your lover calling your phone and having your spouse see they are calling.
If you feel yourself getting emotional or falling in love you need to keep a level head. Its easy to slip up and make risky choices that can get you caught if you become emotional.
If it is a true love affair and your AP is definitely your soulmate you may want to get a divorce to be together, life is short after all. However its worth waiting a few months to a year to make sure your feelings stay true.
As men we are stereotyped as more likely to cheat, its slightly harder to cheat as a man than as a woman.
If you travel for work this is the time to have an affair. You can use Ashley Madison or Tinder to scope out women in the city you plan on traveling to.
While there are exceptions, its best to avoid relationships with single women over 35. In my experience these women can become clingy and even try to sabotage your marriage.
Young women – women in their early 20s are simply the best if you are looking for sex. They are hot, they aren’t looking to settle, they are fun to be around.
Married women – women who are married usually are on the same page as you with what they want. Its rare for a married woman to want to ruin your marriage.
If you have alot of assets your mistress could try to sue you for damages. In order to prepare for a worst case scenario you should find a good lawyer and have them draw up a contract.